Recognizing the Truth

I crave the truth.  Most definitely, I want to recognize it the moment I see it.  And yes, sometimes the truth is hard to face. Yet, I still want to be in the know.  As a mom of many, I have a keen eye for a scam.  

Face it, kids will try and deceive for a variety of reasons.  Perhaps, if you are like me, this is your superpower. Certainly, we are all well trained in the saying, “if it looks too good to be true, it probably is.  Unfortunately, present company included, many of us have taken the bait; hook, line, and sinker.  

However, in the past few months, while writing and editing my third book, “Well, Girl” (August 2020) I have uncovered many new to me truths, and I am left undone.  Yes, they seem too good to be true. Still, I believe.  

And I recognized, I recognized a new truth when I first noticed that my five-year-old, Charlie, was using the word “recognize,” rather frequently. 

He does this. Charlie picks up a new word, and then he cannot wait to add it to his dialogue.  This boy, he is a laugh riot. Charlie has a raspy voice. He sounds a little like he smokes a pack a day.  But he also cannot enunciate L’s, D,s, W’s, or P’s, and he tends to use a unique pronoun, he and his brother, Sam embraced since the first time they communicated.  Instead of the usual him, her, he, her, they use, “herms.”  

“Herms won’t share!”  or “Herms went to the movies.”

You get it.  

So on Sunday when my husband, Justin took the boys, also known as the vandals, to the park, they returned with Charlie in hysterics.  Young Charles had fallen and hurt his leg. According to him, he would never walk again.  

I knew this was most likely an exaggeration.  

A couple of hours later he ran past me in the hall.  I chirped, “Oh thank goodness! You are not crippled for life!  Be sure and tell your father, he is very concerned.”  

Charlie stopped in his tracks and said, “Nope!  Don’t tell herm! Wet’s wait and see if herm can weckognise I am walkin just fine!”  

I kept the secret.  But recognize rang in my ears.  I headed to my office and added it to my notes.  And I didn’t know why.  I just knew it would be important later.

A little while later, with other things on his mind, Justin was working at the dining room table, when Charlie walked up to him and said, “Daddy!  Youm didn’t eBen weckognise that I can walk!”

Justin apologized for the lapse in parenting and celebrated with Charlie over the “miraculous” healing.  

And that is when it hit me, I recognized a huge truth.  One I had missed, and one my God was eager for me to embrace.  

Our Father in Heaven doesn’t miss a thing.  

Sure, I have said this, and yes, I was raised on this truth.  But I don’t think I really got it until that moment. And, if I am honest, it took me a full day of pondering and scripture and stewing before I was ready to say it out loud.  

Of the emails I receive, it is quite obvious that many of us feel as though God has forgotten or that is not paying attention to us.  More often than not I hear from readers who say, “I don’t feel Him near…” or “I feel so far from God right now.”  

And I know, I have been there.  But I am certain, I will never feel that way again. 

Bold?

Yes.  

No, that doesn’t mean that I won’t face my share of trials.  But what I didn’t recognize until Charlie starting using “weckognize,” was that God doesn’t move away, I do.  

And this is big, perhaps it is small to you.  But over and over I have noticed scripture and teachings about our unity to Christ, I just haven’t wholly applied it.  And by applying it I mean instead of chasing Him and justifying Him, I haven’t rested in His presence.  

I ask Him for help and then I jump straight into my worries and humanness and wait for a thunderbolt.  When the thunderbolt doesn’t arrive I testify to the lack. And I am embarrassed to admit, I can picture Him at the dining room table saying, “Yes, I heard you, I recognize your need. I am right here… stop, slow down, let’s just be.”  

But I have things to do, places to be, and I dwell in the comfort of my struggles.  

Yes, I know that one is hard to swallow. However, I am convinced that the past is more comfortable than the unknowns of the future.  The past, recounting and dissecting it is like a really bad habit, one that makes the future seem more secure.  

I mean, I know what I have failed at, and I am confident, in most cases, I won’t make the same mistakes a third or sixth time.  And I know who to walk away from and who to count among my friends. But I also know, I have gotten a little less brave and a little more recluse from the folly.  

Still, it is those things that keep me grounded in the past instead of boldly rushing into the future.  And if believing God is the catalyst to doing brave things, I should have already secured my parachute and been ready to valor the heights.  

Not really, you are not getting me to jump out of a plane, no matter how much I love Jesus.  

But I know if I know, He wants me to recognize Him in me.  He wants me to believe in the mountains being moved. More importantly, He invites me to imagine it as if it was already done, let go of the side of the plane and jump. 

And while I am not much for resolutions, I have resolved to never question His presence again.   This is my bold new recognition. Not only can nothing separate me from His love, nothing can separate me from Him.  

He is right here.  

Right now, at this moment.  

I cannot hide from Him.  

And I don’t want to.  

What I recognize is what I have spoken in the past is a lack of Him.  A need to get more of that which I am already drenched in. 

Granted, this fills pews and collection plates.  It is a big-ticket price, on the how-tos of getting more of that which was already bought and paid for.  Don’t get me wrong, we need the church, the Body is important. But I will no longer ignore the power that is so much a part of me, I wouldn’t recognize myself without Him.  

I am a firm believer in this, we are what we speak.  

And if I speak lack, I am lacking.  

If I speak lost, I will only wander.  

Were I to profess He is not near, I recognize, I am ignoring the Truth of who He is and why He died for me.  

The veil was torn.  

This sacrifice was complete.  

Now He calls me friend.  

The least I can do is recognize, He is right here.  

Jesus be all over you… in you, around you, everywhere.  Love, J 

“Complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind.” Philippians 2:2 

 

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