so quick to offer mercy to everyone but yourself

Asking for a friend…

So have you ever known someone with a very specific spiritual gift?

For instance, Mercy.

This girl I know, we will call her Jane, she offers mercy at nearly an inappropriate level. It shocks her. When Jeffery Dahmer was beaten to death in prison, she threw up and didn’t sleep for a week. She went to see her spiritual advisor because… it was JEFFERY DAHMER; he ate people. He was a sick individual. However, she could not stop grieving for all the loss. Those who were eaten, and he that ate them… moreover, then was brutally beaten to death.  He was someone’s baby boy.  Those whom he killed were someone’s children.

Jane’s spiritual advisor offered her this gem. “God gives different views to his children individually. Thank HIM and then boldly extend that view as He has extended it to you.”

God gives different views to his children individually. Thank him and then boldly extend mercy as He has offered it to you.”


And Jane offers mercy.  It is her spiritual gift. To see things from the view of the abused, and the abuser. Mercy is not always admired. Many find it foolish. And Jane is not stupid.  Jane knows that child molesters and drunk drivers and butt-heads need to pay their dues, but she also believes in restoration. Moreover, restoration is a bi-product of mercy. 


However, Jane has one individual she will not offer mercy.  She is nasty to this person. When this person is late, Jane is just wicked to her. When this girl does not get to the laundry or her house is a mess – Jane is disgusted with her.  Jane chastises this poor girl. She offers her no breaks, no peace and she speaks to her in the harshest of terms.  This dear spirit that God loves is treated as a creature from the deep by Jane.  When she ate pizza for lunch, breaking her diet, Jane called her a cow and told her she hated her.

So Jane was lending mercy to another broken human.  The person had messed up pretty badly.  Jane wept with her, prayed with her, and wept some more.

Later that evening, Jane was chastising her nemesis for her fat and lazy ways, and God interrupted her.

“Jane, why are you so quick to offer mercy to everyone but yourself?
Jane was taken aback. “Well, I know better than to eat pizza, and look at these floors!” She bemoaned. “I am a horrible housekeeper.  And I am terrible at dieting. I am such a loser.”

and why are you so quick to offer mercy to everyonebut yourself-

“Jane,” God said, “I would not let you get away with speaking that way to any one of my children.  I would convict you. I would remind you that the person you are speaking of is mine. You are not allowed to speak that way to one of mine… and you are mine.”

And Jane, who offers mercy, who was given the spiritual gift of mercy, who grieves with those who grieve, was convicted of how harsh she treats herself.



And she craves a level of achievement that is both pleasing to her and God… however, she struggles with treating herself much more harshly than she treats anyone else on the planet.  Moreover, it is hard for Jane to imagine that God would be so gentle with someone like her who messes up so often.

Of course, this is just a hypothetical, do you know anyone like Jane?  I am asking for a friend of course.

May your floors be sticky and your calling ordained.  Love, Jami


“But go and learn what this means: ‘I desire mercy, not sacrifice.’ For I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.” Matthew 9:13

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  1. christy mobley on March 4, 2016 at 6:06 am

    Jane, I’m mean Jami, isn’t that always the way it is…unless you are someone Donald Trump, you are harder on yourself than anyone else. I know I am.
    I love you!

    • jami_amerine on March 4, 2016 at 6:07 am

      I love you too!

  2. Lorraine on March 4, 2016 at 6:27 am

    Ah, Jane…she sounds like s woman I know and love. She is amazing. ❤️ Great tribute and lesson for many today, my friend.

    • jami_amerine on March 4, 2016 at 6:28 am
  3. Julie Hensley on March 4, 2016 at 6:58 am

    Jane is a daily blessing to me with her uplifting posts and blogs. I love Jane … I treat myself As Jane. I have zero tolerance for any mistake, ineptitude, lack of confidence. Jane may be that mean voice in my head that berates me all day long through my every action and word. Jane is not nice:( Jami is nice- don’t be confused-ha!!! I love you!!!

    • jami_amerine on March 4, 2016 at 6:59 am


  4. Mary Anne Libcke on March 4, 2016 at 8:03 am

    Needed this today. Struggle daily with this. The “Why can’t I just…”

    • jami_amerine on March 4, 2016 at 8:09 am

      Praying for you friend.

  5. Kelly on March 4, 2016 at 11:22 am

    Great post!

    • jami_amerine on March 4, 2016 at 12:01 pm

      Thanks friend!

  6. candygilbert on March 4, 2016 at 2:04 pm

    I used to be a lot like Jane, though to be honest she probably has a higher mercy gifting than I do or ever did. But the part about being hard on herself is all too familiar. Then I met a woman who saw what I was doing to myself and God used her to get through to me. Over the next 5 years I began to learn how to love even me and whoa! the transformation has been nothing short of miraculous. We should really have coffee – I mean Jane and me. She should stop by anytime. She may get to see me loving myself in the mess. Or she may catch me on the one day a month or so where things are presentable around here. Who cares. There are so many better things to do than clean! And that my friend is progress!!

    • jami_amerine on March 4, 2016 at 2:06 pm

      You and Jane really should do coffee… Since you love next door to her. It’s kind of silly

  7. Abby on March 4, 2016 at 4:03 pm

    Oh how I can relate to this. I find it so easy sometimes to extend mercy to others but when it comes to myself, it’s difficult. Love this, friend. Good stuff! xoxo

    • jami_amerine on March 4, 2016 at 4:06 pm

      Thanks so much Abby!

  8. Jane Grant Carter on March 23, 2016 at 9:44 am

    And my name is……Jane. This sorta hits home; but, maybe that is a good thing.

    • jami_amerine on March 23, 2016 at 9:47 am

      Hi Jane!

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